Dear Evil Overlords at Advertising Agency,
Look no further for your newest Jr. Copywriter Evil Henchmen. With my background as a storyteller rampant liar, an artist a vandal, and a creative problem solver creator with a diverse background of evil experience, I am contacting you because of my interest in your agency’s unique take on world domination and in the position of Jr. Copywriter within the general calamity team. I believe my own unique path in life has left me with the skills needed to join your crew.
I spent the last decade coming up with creative solutions problems in many different forms, with the end results ranging from branding and murals rampant property destruction to emails and listicles (which are already pretty soul crushing).
My experiences throughout this journey showed me the myriad of different ways my ideas impact individuals, communities, cities and companies, all for the better worse. I’m drawn to you because of the unique and highly relatable content you are unleashing out into the world and I want to be a part of the chaos.
Additionally, I have experience working in a creative agency a vanity-filled cesspool; most recently I have been in an Account Coordinator a Prison Warden role at Bespoke Reps, a creative photo agency.
My love for the Advertising world goes back way further than that; my time at the University of Missouri – Columbia graduating from the Journalism Propaganda School with a focus on Copywriting and Art Direction for Advertising Brainwashing the Masses, my experiences in life align with your company’s search for the right candidate as well as with our visions for the future.
Furthermore, I have experience and appreciation contempt for working with being ordered around thanklessly by all different kinds of people from all walks of life. As a vandal I can think creatively on the fly in regards to concepts, notes, criticism, the best ways to break a man’s spirit, and more. Working Customer Service for both brands and restaurants gave me meticulous juggling and communication skills nothing but loathing for mankind, so I will have no moral qualms about any nefarious deeds.
Please let me know the best way to follow up with you! If I haven’t heard from you in two weeks I will begin plotting my revenge against you all! I appreciate your time and consideration!
All the best worst,
Spencer McCarty